Byline: staff

A Better Course Guide

Courses you actually want to take.

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103 Things to Do as a Prefrosh

The Nass compiled the definitive list of necessary prefrosh experiences

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Prefrosh Portraits

They’re coming.

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The Nass Weekly’s Weekly Diet

“‘Ere we come, ‘ere we come, ‘ere we come to eat some snacks!” That’s the song you sing as you roll your way to the feeding tubes, you glutinous masses of orca-fat-fattened lard-balls! And what do you have to say for yourselves? Nothing, because your mouths are blocked up by the pendulous weight of your sagging cheeks and you have forgotten all words except “more” and “a little bit more” and “perhaps just another dollop.”

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Jeremiah Was a Prophet

Jeremiah (“The Weeping Prophet”) is famous for prophesying the destruction of Jerusalem and the exile of the Jews. In the Hebrew Bible, God called to Jeremiah in 626 BC and said that the Jewish people had forsaken him by worshiping false idols. God instructed Jeremiah to proclaim that unless they repented, the Israelites would be pillaged by a foreign nation and exiled from their land as punishment.

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The Nass 100

1. Natalee Holloway. 2. James Taylor, and the giant pussies who love James Taylor. 3. Wasps who give “spiels”. 4. My roommates using my Ann Coulter poster as a jizz-rag. 5. That one kid who finished Infinite Jest. 6. Vaguely … Read More

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Divorces & Celebrations

Cam Asutra & Sue Trakama Cam Asutra knew from the moment he saw Sue Trakama walking down the aisle in December of 2009 that their marriage was going to end in divorce. Ms. Trakama was wearing a wedding dress that … Read More

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Spring 2011 Course Guide

__ARC 269 / EEB 269__
Owl City: Could It Happen?

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The Nass 100

100 things the staff of the Nassau Weekly doesn’t want to see again next year.

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A Better Course Guide

Courses that take YOU

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A Better Course Guide

“MNG 105: What to Expect When You’re Expectorating” and other courses.

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The Nass 100

1. Your idea for a new campus publication

100. That night I held you and we just laughed and cried till morning

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