Category: Humor

Wondering Why?

Dear Wise Wendy, I’m having trouble getting anything done for class now that it’s nice outside. Any suggestions as we move into finals? From, Procrastinator Dear Procrastinator, Of course I have suggestio Dear Wise Wendy, How do I get over … Read More

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104 Hours in Calcutta

It all started with a little hash. Or rather, it all started with no hash. Or was it Old Monk? No, that’s not it. I’m not starting far back enough. I arrived in Calcutta on a Thursday night. I had … Read More

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Wondering Why?

Dear Wise Wendy,
How do you snookle a pookieboogle?
Snook-Curious

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From the Editors

First Voice Message: Today, Friday, the 3rd, 4:27 a.m. — The sounds of Manhattan circa 3 a.m., most noticeably an earnestly diegetic purring. — Hey, man, I know it’s been awhile. — Palpable, nay, precocious, slurring — I’m calling to … Read More

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Wondering Why?

Dear Wise Wendy,
I can’t reach the top shelf in my house, but I need to get something out of it! What do I do?
From,
Shorty with a Problem

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Ardently, Maddeningly, Gloriously Tempted

All men lusted for the firebrand they called Flaming Tina, famed for the molten fire in her hair — and for the hot temper running fierce through the noble Scblood of Lady Valentina Kennedy. Forced into marriage with the fearsome warrior of an enemy clan, Tina vowed to use her wild beauty to gain mastery over Lord Ramsay Douglas. Women hungered to be pressed against his steely chest … and men feared the brawn and rage of Black Ram Douglas. Ram swore he would make the defiant Valentina a dutiful wife after he had broken her hellion’s pride. But the girl he set out to tame became the woman who taught him what it meant to be ardently, maddeningly, gloriously tempted.”

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A letter to my TI lover

Dear Guy from TI the other night, aka Mike, aka My Love, My Love, My Love,

What the hell happened? I’m so pissed at you that I can’t even talk to you about it face-to-face. Also, I can’t find you, which makes it harder to talk to you face-to-face. Isn’t this weird? I’m pissed at you, but I still love you. Look at that. So I’ve resorted to writing this letter in the hopes that you’re the one guy who goes to TI who also reads the Nass.

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Letter To the Editorial Board

A Concern with an Article.

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A couple of things to consider when picking classes

I know you’ve heard it, or, if not, then you’ve felt it somehow, sweeping through the dorm room hallways, rolling around Café Viv, and whirring past kids on their way to Firestone. There is a buzz in the air, and no, it’s not the bees or the wind that’s making that sound. I’m talking about that time halfway through the semester or so when the course catalog comes out.

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Why Princeton students are like flowers

I went up to a girl who was yelling so loudly and excitedly that I thought I was in an episode of America’s Next Top Model right after the model-hopefuls have found out that they’re going to some foreign country, like Africa or Spain. “What’s the commotion?” I asked as we stood in front of Ivy, half expecting her to tell me that we were all going to Bali together.

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Georgia, Seen From Ukraine

For Poland, Belorussia, and Ukraine, then, Russia remains a hungry, imperialist bear.

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Debate Scorecard, Part III

HE MAKE IT RAIN HE MAKE IT RAIN HE MAKE IT RAIN HE MAKE IT RAIN—GEORGE BUSH “[T]his is a final verdict on the failed economic policies of the last eight years… that essentially said that we should strip away … Read More

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