It all came to me freshman year while studying Russian syntax and reading some Puskin. I’m there with a semi-erect penis (a state in which I often find myself when studying anything Slavic) and snacking on a chocolate chip cookie … Read More
If there is a God, and a moral order to the world, making a 100 million dollar donation to Princeton earmarked for the arts will not get you into heaven. Wandering through Princeton’s art museum the other night for the … Read More
It’s 5:37 a.m. and I’m straggling through the slums in neon orange short-shorts I reserve for nights like these, nights like last night, along with the first shirt I saw on the ground which I couldn’t really see in the dark of his room but it’s large and now the sunrise has revealed it to be a tee shirt from some leadership conference or some shit and I think This is ironic because I was totally leading last night if you know what I mean and then I’m like is that even irony or am I just awesome?
Sometimes, you forget: there are people out there who do absolutely brilliant, incredible things. Even at achievement-filled Princeton—especially at achievement-filled Princeton—greatness, which is a level below the place I write about, can become benign and unimpressive. Talent becomes the norm … Read More
In perhaps the greatest scoop of the year, specialists with the Nassau Weekly Department of Literary Espionage discovered an advance copy of J.M. Coetzee’s newest work in the men’s room stall of “The Mother of All Bathrooms” on the 300 … Read More
“But I can say this: as I stood on stage on that final sold-out Saturday and belted out the final lyrics to the finale, “We’re home!” for the first time since arriving on Princeton’s campus I felt like I had a place on this campus. I felt at home.”
