In six days God created, the heavens and the Earth

But He gave us no way to determine our relative social worth

Well, Princetonians are problem solvers, that’s just our inclination

We’re in the nation’s service, and the service of all nations

In 1879, then, after years and years had passed

From the great minds of us Tigers, a solution came at last

Young Arthur Hawley Scribner did correct God’s awful flub

When, for the worthiest of worthies, he founded Princeton’s Ivy Club

T.I., Cottage, Cannon, Cap, even Tower followed suit

Showed us selective social groups can really be a hoot

So, you’re welcome, world. From our paws came a model you’ll inherit

If you divide ‘em based on social skills–—don’t worry about merit.

For We create what He couldn’t when We conduct our bicker

Three days sessions, two discussions—See! We even do it quicker!