Category: Campus

The Phallic Fraternity

The films we watch, recorded images in motion, are brought to us by the camera’s privileged eye. The camera is privileged to “be there” when the actual moving bodies do their thing.

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A Paean to Woods and Death

On autumn Sundays my parents would fuck wildly, like children. I remember this vividly. It was November and the air had begun to turn to steel. The turn was final. Pennsylvania does this each year—dies, maybe before Halloween, maybe after, … Read More

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Invisible Fratter

“Master Race! Master Race!” chanted my drunken Aryan friends. The “Beer Olympics” had seemed like a great idea; what better way to build camaraderie amongst brothers than to engage in the spirit of competition, and to do it while getting shitfaced?

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The Beach: A Brofile

The beach is at once a confusing and wonderful thing to behold. Like a sandbox for man children, the beach is full of all the earthly pleasures one would expect of such a place–one metric ton of white sand, an inflatable treasure chest cooler filled with Coronas, a leafy green palm tree and a speaker from which the country stylings of the Zac Brown Band can regularly be heard.

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Just Cool Enough for School

Bicker is an important rite of passage for people with a creeping suspicion that they might be cool. Champagne bubbles and dreams of Ivy League grandeur saturate even the most level of heads. Some even go so far as to … Read More

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Luv 4 a Night

We spent approximately 30 hours talking about everything from the nature of the universe to the limitations of the human mind. The usual stuff. We sat on the corner of a couch outside a library; the couch was blue. Nothing … Read More

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What’s In a Name?

As a self-proclaimed solipsist, I have always attached much importance to my name and seen it manifest itself in the least expected of places. But in my pampered youth of Plaza teas surrounded by the redolence of a fine Cavendish … Read More

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iFlurtz, and I Hurts

There are many students here who, next Monday, will be able to spend the day or the night with someone they care about deeply. These people are lucky. The rest of us will spend St. Valentine’s Day doing something that … Read More

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Consider the Stalker

The cover of last week’s issue of the Nassau Weekly featured the face of Tony Kadyhrob, a 68-year-old man recently accused of trying to entice local college students into his car. Kadyhrob’s story would’ve been a minor one, had his mugshot not come out the way it did: to the collective delight of the Internet, it looks a little like Christopher Walken.

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Physical Princeton

Space in this Princeton place.

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From the Editors

Dear Reader, How’s our day going? Actually not that great, now that you ask. We’re still pretty hurt that you never wrote in to our how-was-*The Life of Pi*-not-a-hoax essay contest, and that hundred bucks is burning a whale of … Read More

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The Princeton Rub

Princeton. A well-established, reputable institution. A hotbed of intellectual curiosity and homoeroticism. Wait – come again?

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